Sex scenes are an art unto themselves. Make things too hot and realistic, and you'll forever be relegated to the annals (sorry) of Sex Movie History where all anyone remembers is the sex, like 9 1/2 Weeks or Crash (the 1996 James Spader car-wreck-fetish movie, not the one with Ludacris). Go too far down the PG-13 route, however, and why even have a sex scene in the first place? Looking at you, Pierce Brosnan-era James Bond movies, with your generic-ass "rolling around under beige linens while a gentle breeze flutters the curtains" nonsense.

Here, for better or worse, by design or sheer disaster, are the funniest sex scenes in movie history. Because we all know you know exactly where to find the actually hot ones.

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Without exaggeration, I believe this to be one of the greatest achievements in sex scene history. Will Forte and Kristen Wiig's work here is peerless. From the line that kicks off the action itself (MacGruber, refusing to have his bullet wound sewn up, whispers "I like holes" before kissing Wiig's Vicki St. Elmo), to the song choice ("Broken Wings" by Mr. Mister). The whole thing begins funny enough as a parody in itself, with shots of writhing, oiled torsos and a catastrophically irresponsible number of candles. "I get it," you say.

Then, the music cuts, the soft focus is lost, and we're treated to a far too long single-shot scene of MacGruber GOING AT IT. His grunts are horrible, his dirty talk, worse ("I'm gonna fill you up!" he moans). It's awful, and goes on far too long, which is just the way it should be. A reprise of the joke, taking place in a graveyard of all places, does nothing to blunt the experience; in fact, it enhances it. A masterpiece.

Another cult comedy classic, for severely different reasons, that is quite frankly too gross and NSFW to post here. Believe not a word star/writer/director/producer Tommy Wiseau says: This entire film was meant to be played straight. It features not one but two passionless, borderline-disgusting sex scenes between its leads, which if legend holds true, were shot on the FIRST DAY of filming (there are also definitely multiple uses of the same shot across both separate sex scenes). A disaster within a disaster. We're lucky to have it.

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